Once upon a chicken

I have a million and half other things I need to be doing right now (namely REDECORATING our Christmas tree, since our Griswold tree fell over today), but I have to write this story down so I can look back on it in 20 years (and tomorrow, when I’m homicidal over something) to remember how hilarious Declan is.

I wasn't kidding.

So his new “thing” right now is yelling for me after Paul puts him to bed so that I can tell him a story. Paul has already read him stories, so this is nothing but straight up manipulation like only a 3 year old can master. Most manipulation tactics I ignore, but A) I don’t want him waking up Simon and B) who can resist one last snuggle from a giggling little boy? Nobody, that’s who.

So most nights, I go in and he says “Mommy, tell me a story,” and then he proceeds to tell me basically everything he wants the story to be about. Usually it’s a convoluted recap of the day’s events, with some imagination thrown in for good measure. Lately, though, his little imagination is taking off, and tonight, well, he took the cake.

A transcript:

Declan: Mommy, tell me a story. No, 100 stories.

Me: No. I’ll tell you 1 story.

Declan: OK, 1 story from 100 books.

Me: How about 1 story ABOUT 100 books?

Declan: OK.

Me: Once upon a time, a little boy named Declan …

Declan: And my friend. Chicken.

Me: You have a friend chicken?

Declan: Yes. 

Me: What’s his name?

Declan: Ken. But he’s a girl.

Me: So, you have a friend who is a girl chicken named Ken?

D: Yes, she’s my girlfriend.

Me: (cracking up) Of course. Is she big or little?

D: She’s my size! (laughing) You crack me up!


Me: OK, so once upon a time, Declan and his girlfriend Ken wanted to go on an adventure, so they went on a walk through town. At the end of the street, they saw a door they had never noticed before. They went in the door, and it was a bookstore, with 100 books…

D: 100 Strawberry Shortcake books!!!!!!!

Me: Oh jeez… yes, 100 Strawberry Shortcake books… etc., blah blah, adventures, a pirate ship, adventures start in books, the end.

I think he’s in charge of story-telling from now on.




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3 responses to “Once upon a chicken

  1. That’s hysterical. He’s got a great imagination. I’m so sorry about your tree. That happened to us one year on Christmas Eve, and a number of heirloom ornaments were destroyed. We all stood around the tree and sobbed. Now we tie it to something to prevent further mishaps.

  2. Christi Wampler

    Leslie, to be perfectly honest, when I looked at the mess, I pretty much instantly thought of you and your family. I was so mad for like 2 seconds, and then I thought “They are just ornaments, there are plenty more left, be thankful…” I’ve still got that tree skirt and topper if you want them!

  3. greytmommy

    love that Declan has a chicken friend. That is FABULOUS. You should bring him over here and he can tell us which one of my chickens look like Ken.

    Oh, and how messed up am I that I know that chicken picture is of a Light Sussex without even having to look it up. I have a problem….

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